While waiting for my return flight to Toronto yesterday, I decided to grab a snack and sit down at a table in the main lounge and observe people. That, and check my email at the same time. After a while, I started hearing some really odd remarks by some of the people passing by, so I decided to hop on Twitter and chronicle a few of the interesting quotes I heard in 1.5 hours while at Heathrow Airport.

You can find all the updates on my Twitter account, but here they are just for preservation sake:

“Um, so where are we flying to again? And why? Because I have a manicure scheduled for tomorrow.”

“Wait, we’re going on a plane? I thought you said we were flying there?”

“Look honey, he’s using his computer here. I didn’t know computers worked at airports!”

“Is there a place to sleep here? Because my flight doesn’t leave for another 3 days.”

“See, they even have Facebook in England.”

“This country is so backwards. I can’t even find a copy of the San Francisco Chronicle in this shop.”

“Hot pink pants aren’t for everyone, but that guy really pulls it off well.”

(Man about to approach departure gate, after checking in long ago.) “S**t, I forgot my luggage in the taxi.”

“Sixty pounds for a raffle ticket? That’s like, fifty American dollars!”

“Is there a bathroom here? Because I’m about to explode, and I know explosions are not allowed on planes.”

“I’m so glad I fly first class. The other people here are all so … normal.”

“Do they have the AC on? It’s colder than Canada in this terminal!”

“Imagine if that guy’s Mac and that lady’s PC had a wrestling match, WWE style? That would be too cool.”

“Qantas is a wonderful airline. They let you get drunk on the plane for free.”

(at 2:20pm) “Yum, fried chicken for breakfast. The best way to start my day. Want some?”

“Is this Starbucks owned by same man that owns the one in Hong Kong? I think he steal that man’s logo.”

(Man on mobile) “Hey honey, where are you?” (Woman aloud) “Sitting in the chair directly in front of you. Look up.”

“They shouldn’t have shops in an airport. People might buy stuff.”

“I’m too tired to just be sitting here doing nothing.”

“Why did I have to go through security? It’s not like I’m insecure or something.”

My Twitter friend booyaa responded best with his short message: “And to think some of these people maybe in positions of power… *shudders*”.